Releasing her grip from the arms of the chair, Charlotte searched for her her calm. It only half arrived and it took several more minutes for Charlotte to wrench herself from the chair and to stand.
She thought, fleetingly, of Todd and wondered if he’s already received her letter. She wondered if he would even come back, given the way everything played out for him. Particularly between he and Charlotte’s mother.
Reconciling that past would not be easy for him, that much Charlotte knew, but she also knew how much she needed him right now. And that was something Todd did not know.
She would be blindsiding him and, assuming he arrived at all, the risk that he would leave right then and there stood out. But Charlotte knew she did not have a choice. At least not by her thinking.
The way things fell into place, the course she had set for herself, and the course that others had set for her meant that Charlotte was walking a dangerous path that she could no longer walk on her own. While her mother would have immediately demanded she not do something as foolish as this, every ounce of her being told her she had to complete this, for her mother, for herself, and even for Todd, who probably deserved more closure than anyone else over Amy’s death, next to Charlotte herself.
Standing, Charlotte knew she had to do something. Staying in the house all day would do her no good, and she also needed to get out there and meet Todd. They weren’t long for the meeting time now, and she needed to settle her nerves before this meeting. So much depended on it.